Holding Men to a Higher Standard

We had a great meeting on Saturday at the Salt Lake Library. The women who attended gave some great suggestions on creating a list of characteristics that they wanted in their relationships with men.

First, we talked about co-dependency and I recommended a great book titled, "Women Who Love Too Much" by Robin Norwood. Women have a gift for being great caregivers but when they cross over to the "dark" side and become rescuers -- realtionships can go very wrong. Remember, when a relationship is not working it is generally both people who are doing it badly.

Second, I reminded the single moms that they are the gatekeepers in their family. It is the mom's job to ensure that the children are safe. We decided that a new male friend should not really be introduced to the children for about six months. It also is a good idea to check out his work, friends, and associates to make sure he is who he says he is.

Third, before you meet anyone, create a list of character traits you want in a potential partner and measure individuals by that list. Take off the "rosecolored" glasses and take a good hard look before you are so emotionally involved you can't see straight.

Here is a sample of what we came up with:
1. Trustworthy
2. Hardworking
3. Kind and well mannered
4. Good to the other women in his life, eg. mom, sisters, etc
5. Thrifty
6. Able to express his thoughts and feelings
7. Supports you in your goals
8. Doesn't try to change you

This is just a short list, you need to create your own. Most importantly, if you want these qualities in your partner, he will probably want you to have the same qualities. Get yourself ready before you go looking for Mr. Right and you'll find he'll show up all by himself because he is attracted to your fine character.

 ~Karen

~Confidence~

What does confidence mean to you? Confidence, to me, means someone who wakes up each and every day and faces life head on no matter what it may be.

Confidence doesn’t have to mean doing something out of your comfort zone, or pushing the limits.  At first take baby steps -- you are showing confidence even when you think you have none, we can see it.

After you feel comfortable with where you are at, try something new and go into it thinking "I've got this" -- "I can do it." Never say I can’t. Can’t is a word I’ve removed from my vocabulary because I can do anything I set my mind to -- and I can be great at whatever I do -- and I will be great at what I choose to do and accomplish in my life. Napoleon Hill said that anything the mind can conceive and you believe, you can do and be great at it! You might want to read his book called "Think and Grow Rich."

Write yourself little notes and leave them around the house reminding you how wonderful you are.  It will all build up inside and make you even more confident to take on anything that comes your way without thinking twice. Not often are we told on a daily basis how wonderful and amazing we are, so tell yourself. Look around and see all you’ve done and how much confidence that took. I’m confident in all of you that you will succeed and be even more amazing than you already are.

~Amanda